Search This Blog

Saturday, May 28, 2011

Travelogues that can change your life

Among the variety of existing films, unfortunately, only a few can be called successful and truly spectacular travelogue. Movies that can change people's lives, give impetus to the attainment of a new consciousness and new values ​​are very small.

Lovers' tourism on the couch "to be extremely careful when watching these movies - there's a chance that after seeing, you will want to collect the bag and buy a one way ticket to Nepal, Indonesia or South America ...
The film "Into the Wild"

What would happen if people abandon all common values ​​of society? Just throw the blessings of civilization and all attachments to society, and will move in search of real freedom?

To these questions seeks to answer a very powerful film Sean Penn's Into the Wild. "The movie shows the final part of American guy, who had gone into a long journey in search of true freedom. Rejecting all the values ​​of our society, man overcomes many obstacles, make new friends, struggles with loneliness, to the end to make sure that the price of absolute freedom - his own life ...

The film "The Beach"

The hero of the movie "The Beach" is trying to find paradise in a particular place secluded from civilization. The life of a hippie commune on the beautiful island of Thailand turns his life and helps to reconsider all their values​​. Despite the bad ending, this film gave a strong impetus for the independent tourist to Thailand, and the island of Phi Phi, where the film "The Beach" became a symbol Travel to Paradise.

The film "Eat, Pray, Love"

The film that no matter how far you have not left the country on my own to go is impossible. Travel helps us look at his past life detached and objective manner. For many women, this movie was this instruction to rectify their personal lives. The travelers in the style of "Eat, Pray, Love" flocked to India and Southeast Asia, hoping to find myself again ...

The film "Seven Years in Tibet"

In my film "Seven Years in Tibet" - the most powerful of all films about travel. Alternate randomly delayed journey German climbers in Tibet for seven years. Stay away from the traditional civilization gave the protagonist a chance to reconsider his life, his attitude and gain peace of mind. With the release of this film Tibet became a desirable world for travelers seeking the path to enlightenment.

The film "Aztec Sun"

Sometimes, to appreciate that your happiness is very close, it is necessary, rejecting a routine habit, "cross the mountains and the sea, to overcome the dangers and hardships ...». Optimistic German film "Aztec Sun" makes us appreciate what you have and from time to time to change something in life, at least during the trip.

Want to travel? Then start at least with movies.

Sheathing radiators

Paneling is a decorative design radiator. Because it degrades heat radiators, it is already in the calculation of the central heating system should take into account a decrease of heat transfer panels with sheathing.

From the shell you want, on the one hand, to make it as much as possible closed pipes, and on the other minimally impeded air circulation. Not to close the entire area from floor to window sill, the distance between the floor and sheathing shall be not less than 8 cm, and from the sill to the skin - 8-10 cm
Sheathing fastened in various ways: nail on the legs to the floor, attach the anchors on the sides of the clutch or hang directly on the battery. The latter - a very simple way, as the lining can be removed for repair, cleaning and battery, etc. As the suspended device use steel strips of 4 × 20 mm, attached perpendicularly to the frame (between the units of the battery and cladding).
In the manufacture of facing the shield must not be forgotten that there should be openings for natural ventilation (Fig. 1).

Free-standing battery usually close tungsten design, with both sides strengthened with anchors in the treasure. The upper lid skin should be made of material which will not harm the constant stream of warm air.
Fig. 1. Facing Battery
If the sheathing of wooden or fibreboard, the cap should be covered from the inside panel of asbestos or asbestos. As a cover for covering the free-standing battery can be used terratstsevuyu or marble slab or concrete slab with mosaic lining. The upper part of the cladding should be removable (for cleaning batteries.)

How to choose the secateurs?

Pruner, like a shovel, included "weapons, " perhaps every summer resident. This tool is so often demanded that the purchase of high-quality pruners much easier life. But how to choose the appropriate model from a set of tools provided in the stores?

 So, if you're a long time working shears, it makes sense to spend money on a professional tool that will last a long time and will not fail. These shears can remove the branches thick and more than 2.5 centimeters.All available pruners can be divided into four groups.
Most of the pruners are a group of bypass: a convex blade glides over the surface slightly shifted with respect to its concave plate. These are good for all methods of growing crop of live branches, as because of the special arrangement of the knife does not distort the wood, leaving an even cut.
I thrust the blade pruners working wedge-shaped, and the second plate has a ribbed surface, slip-resistant branch. In shears of this type of focus is located directly on the cut line, creating a large enough force, and a wide grip (up to 3 inches) allows you to remove even the old and dry branches, but living it may wrinkle.
The third type - secateurs, scissors with two cutting blades. These pruners are useful for trimming grass in awkward for lawn mowers or trimming stations, cutting flowers, faded thin grass stems and very young shoots, twigs hardened as they crushed, and even divorce cutting blades is small - 1,5-2 cm.
And last, the least widely marketed type - rechargeable pruners - Makita 4603DW.
Of course, cutting tools, in particular, pruners, must be sharp enough, otherwise he would crumple and crush the branch, and such wounds are overgrown with a very long time. Therefore, when choosing pruners pay attention to the blade.
Determines the quality of their steel from which they are made. According to experts, the best quality blade pruners in Japanese. They are made of special hardened steel, does not corrode within a few years do not require sharpening, have a Teflon coating that reduces friction and prevents sticking tar. Hardly inferior to them by quality blade pruners known western companies (Swiss Felco, German Gardena, U.S. Brigadier, Finnish Fiskars, etc.). Domestic pruners, unfortunately, rust and require frequent sharpening.
Usability of the shears depends largely on the handles.
They may be:

aluminum ...
Very easy to work with a pen of microporous rubber pads: they do not slip and do not rub your hands.
Worst of all smooth plastic (on most domestic models) - it is strongly rubbed his hands, and so long shears does not work.
Very convenient so-called "closed" handles that protect hands from possible damage, such as pruning the gooseberry.
Impeccable work pruners also depends on the swivel, which usually consists of a bolt with locking nut.
The gap between the blades of secateurs should be minimal (otherwise pruner will crush the branch), but the move should not be too tight. This shortcoming noted in the Finnish company Fiskars pruners and many domestic ones.
But even the best and ergonomic pruner may be inconvenient for you. And to avoid this, before you buy "try on" a tool in his hand.

How fast grow hair - Myths and Facts

So you've decided at all costs to acquire a beautiful long hair. And while you have in assets - a pair of unruly curls that do not want otrastat.Vy searching the Internet or buy a good book and read about the techniques and methods otraschivaniya hair, trying to follow the advice. And now it turns out that some of these tips does not suit you - or the information is not suitable for use in urban environments, or in these methods have any special nuances, any advice and does not work.

Let's investigate. Consider some of the most popular of recommended resources for otraschivaniya hair and compare them with new modern facilities.
Onion mask on your hair
It is believed that a good way to enhance hair growth. Onions in addition to various trace elements and contains more volatile, and flavonoids that stimulate the scalp and, consequently, accelerate otraschivanie.
There is one very nasty nuance. The fact that the hair perfectly absorb odors - and the onion has a strong "flavor", from which a long time can not get rid of. And if you made yourself onion mask, the hair will smell like stale onions another two weeks, and this despite the shampoos with fragrances and perfumes. Consequently, it is worth several times to think before using this method.Burdock oil.
Applied even grandmothers. The oil should be rubbed into wet hair for 15-20 minutes, then spread over the entire length of hair, close the hood and kept still for about 30 minutes. After that, rinse shampoo.
This is a good remedy, strengthens and nourishes the hair, which is more than caring for hair, rather than stimulates their growth. It is suspected that hair growth is activated by the massage movements that you make, rubbing oil into my head.
Please note that burdock oil is not always good to use for oily hair that's already greasy. Thus, an alternative Burdock oil may be other modern means of hair care products. A faster growth of hair at the same dubious.Yeast
Usually recommended for yeast both inside and outside, using as a mask for hair. For example, you can take a tablespoon of dry yeast, diluted with water, add a tablespoon of honey and two teaspoons of dry mustard. Keep the mask on hair for an hour, rinse shampoo and running water.
In fact accelerates hair growth. True, it's not in yeast and mustard. The fact that the yeast and honey contain many useful substances, such as group B vitamins (vitamins beauty "), E, ​​C, biotin. Not necessarily to keep it all in the hair, you can purchase a vitamin complex, and take it. Even better - make a diet of foods rich in these vitamins. But unlimited reception yeast "inside", unfortunately, can add weight problem.Scalp massage
Performed after washing the hair, which must have time to dry off a bit. Proper massage hair consists of: rubbing the scalp, rubbing his fingers, tapping, pulling, and ventilate the hair, pinching (fingertips can be a little bomber scalp, moving evenly from the top down to the border of hair growth).
Good massage stimulates blood circulation, which in turn can positively influence hair growth. However, without the presence of nutrients in the body you will have nothing to nourish my hair. Therefore, careful diet and daily routine.Boosters in hair growth
Now on the shelves of pharmacies can find a lot of drugs that provide hair growth. We recommend you look at those of them that contain primarily biotin. But, as mentioned above, all these magical miracle drugs can disappoint you if you do not revise your diet and lifestyle.Physiotherapy
The most appropriate would be to apply to the modern achievements of science and technology - in particular, we are talking about physiotherapy. Hike to the beautician will solve a lot of questions at once. Firstly, you can arrange for a comprehensive hair care products. Secondly, such procedures as ozone and mesotherapy can help stimulate blood circulation and scalp to saturate the beneficial nutrients necessary for hair growth.During otraschivaniya hair is desirable

take vitamin complexes and to enrich food products containing zinc, magnesium, potassium, vitamins B, E, C and F. And, of course, biotin (one of the natural sources of biotin is rolled oats);
give up bad habits such as smoking - it is particularly detrimental effect on skin and hair beauty. It is desirable to eliminate from the diet of coffee and strong tea;
avoid mechanical irons and hair dryers, that is to abandon the hair dryer, curling and curlers;
during the trip to the barber to cut hair hot scissors - it helps keep the structure of the hair and protects them from damage.
I. .. you beautiful hair!

Where does the love?

From childhood we are fascinated by the wonderful tales about the beautiful love their heroes. We are going through, when the heroes for a long time can not communicate when they are separated brothers greedy, cruel villains, and capricious kings. We are sincerely glad, when a handsome prince performs his feats and won the main prize of his life - a charming princess. And we always attach great significance to the fact that usually all fairy tales end with the reunification of the young after a long ordeal and hardships, on the fact that they lived happily ever after, at the wedding of the young prince with the princess and the words of honey and beer. And not only the people in his work, but all the classics of the genre in no hurry to continue the story after the climax. Striking examples of such stories: Captain Gray with his girlfriend, charming bear with a penchant for suicide and Princess of An Ordinary Miracle, and all the other happy paired plots, up to the history of relations with the genes of Cheburashka.

In all the happy stories implied that if the family fortune has already been achieved - and then wish to have nothing further. And what else could you want? Only elation, love the merger, the union of hearts - and anything else the young do not expect. And we have from childhood been brought up on the love stories of the fairy tales, books, movies, culminating idyll accept as understandable way of life. And how could it be otherwise? The most important thing - to find this very true love. And then you'll be happy all my life! And the fact that Captain Gray, maybe a year after the wedding, gonna chase the deck and beat her nearly to death and then drank the ship and threw the hapless Assol story with the author modestly silent. Know that we are not supposed to. After all, if you loved and then suddenly fell out of love - so it was not real love. Because true love - forever! So you understand the main task of his personal life? We are looking for everlasting love! The false, fake "love" is not purchased - and relentlessly look for your "half" and eternal love.
Remember the legend of the androgyne? In the ancient gods to avenge them for their disrespect, divided people into two pieces and scattered them in the wide world. Since then, people looking for their own half, and not everyone is destined to find your soul mate. But there is a chance! Look for - and obryaschite! Beautiful? Believe? No? But at heart? Well, just this hope and motivates us to find true love. Repeatedly met people who direct text and give voice to this mythical belief:
- Yes, I lost. And yet, it seemed very fond of. But mistaken. This was not true love! And it is not my real half. But this goes somewhere. Do you think you meet? Nothing to do, I will seek.
I believe that the legend of the androgyne is one of the most harmful myths of mankind. Do not count people who regularly get on this hook, and disappointed in the people and relationships over and over again. How many lives and hearts crippled this legend and other such tales! It is they bring in people naive belief in the eternal and holy love! To some extent, everyone is a victim of this mythology. Can you have not had a great and pure love at least once in your life? A lot of it has been repeatedly. And every time sincerely believe that I met her that same / her sole / single. And fly on the wings, and enthusiastic love, tie, and has to live without your favorite / loved one can not, and everything is fine, and everything is great and all ... all ... all ... And then ... Where did it go? Where did she love, leaves? After all, yet so perfectly it was recently?
Me as a psychologist, is constantly receive letters with similar content:
- My husband and I were very fond of each other all the time after the marriage, each other just souls are not chayali. However, spent all his spare time, he said he loves me, gave flowers every day, our sex brought an incredibly powerful feeling. But at some point, all began to change. He gradually ceased to pay attention to me, although the year and a half I have not gotten worse, and even better. More - more. At first, I only suspected, and then made sure that he has a mistress. After a serious talk and my tears, he began to say that it broke up, but I'm not sure, because our relations are not improving. But now our lives are becoming more and more like a hell. What should I do? How to restore the relationship? How do I return his love?
Very interesting reflection of the love theme in art. Not less than half the popular songs is dedicated to happy love on "Oh, dear, as I feel good with you!". The other half of the songs - an unhappy love affair with the same, judging by everything, the characters, but the other main theme: "Why do you, you bastard, I fell out of love?".
So if there is true love? Let's look at human relationships through the eyes of a psychologist.Cyclical relationship
Love - deceptive country and every citizen in it - a liar. Why should I pay before you, and smile so out of place. Invalid country - love, there is one person - a traitor. But once again sprout grass, through all the obstacles and adversity. Love - a beautiful country, because only there is happiness.
Observations of human relationships can make the following important conclusion.
Any meaningful relationships are five basic stages of development:

These stages are very well illustrated by your five fingers splayed. Look at it from the inside. And reckon the left - right. Thumb - the birth of relationships. Index - development. Average - the culmination. Untitled - destruction. Pinky - death.
Consider that this model of relations. And the real relationship, of course, more complicated every model, but nevertheless the model reflects the basic laws of how the model of the Earth (Globe), reflects the position of the continents. You can easily check this mental model of five stages on their own have ended the relationship. If you do not lie to yourself - you can see how these relationships correspond to the reduced model.
Birth of the relationship - it's tying up a first meeting, first glance, the first conversation, the first interest in each other. Timid invitation for a date and a modest agreement. During this phase, people understand that interesting and least sympathetic to each other and that they have something to do together. At the end of this phase two already understand that they are slightly "hooked" for each other and leave them no longer want. Stage dating ends on a strong desire to develop relations.
Development of relations. The people - "candy-buketny" period. The most romantic period in the relationship. Both lovers seeking the best partner to reveal their qualities and hide their weaknesses. A man gives flowers and gifts, exudes a compliment, do not spend money - he is very caring and gallantry. A woman enjoys this period as Eve's paradise, like a bird in the spring, as the snowdrop sun. In addition, women are particularly pleased that the entire responsibility for the development of relations on a man - and she was playing a game of "try and catch up." It is clear that the princess is running too fast and gets with the maximum pleasure.
For the full sex on stage, the development of women usually do not mature (the man is willing to always), but some liberties she can already afford. It was during this period, especially a woman watching her appearance (and that "love is not"), one might even say, "blooms". So if you notice that your friend, employee or ex-wife changing rapidly - it is a sure sign that a woman is in a phase of love and relationships.
Climax. The most emotionally vivid period - blossoming relationship. This is, in fact, that, for what it is all and brewing. This is a full-fledged sexual fusion, the merging of souls and hearts full of harmony in the relationship. It is joy, happiness, travel and pleasure. This pleasure, inspiration and true love. At least during the climax of a couple in love sure of it. If you ask them about it, they exhaled in unison: "Yes! It is love! "
It is time that will forever remain in our hearts. It's time that we often remember and nostalgic. Climax - it's honeymoon relationship, and it does not matter, official or not. Unfortunately, the culmination not last as long as people expect. Yes, yes, this paradise is always ends suddenly (as in Adam and Eve) and can not continue forever, for reasons which we discuss below.
Destruction. At this stage smoothly lovers smoothly enter after the climax. Usually a sharp boundary and a clear watershed no. Is there an easy sobering, minor problems and misunderstandings, which over time become more and more. This is called - "after the honeymoon began weekdays. I love not already have one of awe and trembling at the sight of each other, have quietly found naked with each other, do not always spend time together and almost did not go to parties and to the theater. The destruction of relationships does not always mean the explicit scenes and smashing crockery on the head.
Often means the destruction of just cooling to each other. Slow as a turtle and a true Australian, as a word merchant. Less sex, less common interests, gifts, taking only ritual character, compliments no longer sound, colors are not visible, but visible hair curlers (tomorrow surprise his colleagues), an old dressing gown (it should continue wearing the same) and holey T-shirt (for ten years in her living and to live will).
Often say:
- But I know people who are lifelong love each other!
I'll be very happy if you demonstrate it to me. Better yet, take a look closer to their life, if you enter them. Most of the so-called "safe" long-term relationship has been going on by inertia. And in essence, such relationships are simply the existence of close (but not together!) With each other - with individual interests, individual feelings, individual cases and a separate life of each partner.
Often fracture in a solid phase for couples very slow, stable and similar to the simple "normal" relations and human affection. But this is a different feeling - which is probably called friendship! And let there be, it is better than indifference.
And already before the final event of the destruction stage could conceivably come to blows, mostly psychological.
- You ruined my life!- Who you will marry this!- Yes for a look!- Where are you, bitch, was up all night?- Mom was right, you're not a couple!
And this is already the agony of relationships.
Death. And all meaningful relationships are dying to be born in this place for something new. And it is also an inevitable step, even though the passing away of one of the partners. But in reality, this step comes much earlier - during his lifetime. And the death of relations does not necessarily mean that people disagree. They can live together, because the children, the apartment, the economy again, the problem. Something new and vaguely dangerous, but just people are afraid of loneliness and the fact that no one will return. And they live in one apartment - but virtually interact with it. Or communicate to the surface, a ritual, nothing meaningful level. In fact, people are almost cease to be meaningful and exist for each other in a psychological sense - often with the staff they interact warmer than with the "former". Relationship becomes sluggish, which can be equated to their deaths. Formally, the relationship continues, but in fact they have already stopped - compared to what they were before.
Interestingly, the relationship to the outside world they may be quite presentable so as not to be subject to condemnation or compassionate participation from others - shameful in front of friends and relatives. And sometimes we are able to convince myself that everything is in order and that it should be ...
Over what period of time pass through all these stages? Answer: Any! The whole cycle can meet in one day, for example, short-term holiday romance. And maybe in fifty years, for example, a long married life to gold - platinum wedding. But the stages of relationships will still be the same!
If talking about the short novel, it is the birth of relations on the beach ("Girl, and the water warm?"), Razvitieotnosheny evening in a bar ("Can we dance?"), The culmination of the sea ("Come on, look to the Moon"), destruction awake in the morning ("And who am I?") and the death of relationships ("I'm sorry, but I was already on the plane").
If it's grandparents, surrounded by her children and grandchildren, the difference is that the entire period takes years and, accordingly, will be the culmination of a long, and the process of destruction delayed. But we should not overestimate the duration of the climax stage, it is unlikely he will take more than six months (cause once again promised to look below).
I hear the voices of those who betray the author's anathema for an attempt to discredit the real relationship, the sanctity of family ties and even the most sacred in human life (scary to pronounce) - love! So I wish to inform hurt in love, it is only reasonable (ie mind) opinion of a psychologist from the feeling of love. And any strong feelings in this case the mind is not a friend - they do not give a sober and unprejudiced refer to any phenomenon - so you first need to cool down. Of course, we, the naive, I want to love was everlasting. You think I'm against it? I did vote for both hands! But on our ballot, nothing much can change. However, our wisdom will be to see all of these processes with the height of the time, when it becomes apparent that is not seen in the flow of time. And if that fails, then at least something can change and tweak.
Let me remind you that those who doubt this theory, but wants to understand, the author proposes once again to review their relationship already finished. With their "former". I am confident that you will easily find all of these stages, and during the peak and duration of the cycle.
How to analyze the existing relationship now, because they last? Then it was on the rise they are on the decline, or at the level of stability - and the picture will be clear about. You must mentally compare their comparative level of some time ago and now. For example, estimate two months ago, relations were warmer or colder? Gave more attention or less? Spend more time or less? If it seems that the relations in a period of stabilization, so it is creeping destruction, poorly visible to the naked eye.
Or maybe it is a sinusoid? Teshim we ourselves thought. I agree, sometimes our relationships resemble a sine wave - then off, then landing. But the aircraft has the highest point of the trajectory, although it can fly it higher, then lower. And any plane finally gets to the airport (or heaven forbid, falls in the forest).
Of course, in the long-term relationship there are always stages of relative ups and downs - the time of cooling and warming. For example, a man into trouble at work, he was knocked out of the rut - a temporary downturn in relations. Then instead of coming to a rest - that's warming. Then the woman gave a reason for jealousy - that's cold snap. Then he went along to the theater - that's warmer again.
But these fluctuations in the level of relations is just relative. The center line, inevitably draws a fateful circle. And all of this sinusoid still fits into the overall final cycle of relationships.Why the love go?
"Time - strengthens and weakens the love of wine" - said the ancient. This is done by nature, life, or rather, our biological defense mechanisms. Let us examine in more detail. Physiology of the body has protective mechanisms of adaptation. What is it? Adaptation - a dulling of sensitivity, then the complete disappearance of sensation during prolonged exposure to the stimulus. How is this process? Nerve centers of our brain have so-called protective inhibition. If the signal from the external environment continues to flow long enough, the nerve centers reduce their sensitivity and the signals from receptors in general are no longer perceived by the brain. The following experiment.
If someone constantly and with equal force to you to stroke his arm in the same place, the first sensation would probably pleasant, neutral in 3 minutes, 10 minutes. inconspicuous, and after 20 minutes you stop to notice them. An adaptation of the tactile.
You went from a dark room to light. First you oslepnite - can not see anything, but after a few seconds eyesight has returned to you. Returned to light in a dark room - pitch dark, utter darkness. But no. A few seconds later you've already guess the outlines of the table. This is a visual adaptation.
What happens if you continually feed your favorite food? Correctly. Get used to it. And even'll push off on my own, as in the "White Sun" Vereshchagin spurn caviar. Another example. Older people remember the lack of exotic products, which seemed to us an incredibly tasty. Bought green bananas and lovingly kept a month before the happy days of ripening. And now? Who says bananas are especially delicious fruit? Well, nothing special, standard of living. An gustatory adaptation.
You entered the room with an unpleasant smell - paint, foot wraps, the mouse behind the cupboard or the owner died a long time did not wash. It is clear that the smell of sharp hit in the nose. But imagine that you could not go! What happens to your sense of smell? I assure you that after a while you will no longer have to notice the smell. There will be adaptation of smell.
There is even a painful adjustment. To some extent, to the pain of the body is able to adapt and reduce their sensitivity to it.
Adaptive mechanisms protect us! If not for them, people could not survive in changing environments. These are examples of adaptation of the senses. But not only they but also the whole of our psyche, the emotions and feelings have this ability to adapt. There's even a popular saying: A person gets used to everything!
Our emotions have the same adaptive mechanisms. Remember as a child the world was particularly bright, the sky is especially blue and the grass especially green! And what now? Used to it! Well, the world and the world. Always so. What's so special?
Now think of your puppy dog ​​enthusiasm, when you first saw the sea!

Child fights - what to do?

Compassion, kindness and consideration for one's neighbor - is social skills. Children learn that ONLY examples. If you want, what would your kid showed them to others, begin actively, sometimes significantly, to show them to each other and to him. Well, for example, in your family someone hurt. You say: "Look, it hurts. Come to spare. "Such feelings must be all the family members to each other. You can feel sorry for the teddy bear, who fell to show compassion to children at the site, if someone or your child has made ​​him ill.

It is useless to scold the child for what he faced another hill. He had the age when he sets the lead. If you do not teach him the attention of your neighbor, then he will continue the aggression on the sly. Better agreement with the mother of another child, so she scolded you. And you'll save his and explain how to do it: "He is bad. He fell. And his mother protects him. Come to spare. You did good. You do not want someone to hurt. "No need to explain how not to do, but rather explain how to do it right.
For example, if your child went shoved someone - you say: "Baby hurt, let him spare. Look what he is good. You want to play with him? Let's give him here this toy. "Directory of aggressive energy in a peaceful direction.
The concept of "impossible" for a child is slightly different from ours. For the child can not - it's something that can not physically do it (the moon, raise cabinet, etc.). What can be done physically, but my mother said "no" - it turns out, mom is cheating, its credibility in the eyes of a child varies. In situations where the child hit in the face and the mom says "no", the kid strikes again - Mom, look at the actual fact can be, and you say you can not! Remarks stern voice here will not work! You need their response and actions to create a child's impression that such behavior is unacceptable. It is not necessary, of course, to beat him back, you can, for example, to seize his arm and deploy a person from himself, or divert to another room, or get the most out of the room - that they themselves come up with, most importantly, to have it done firmly, calmly and confidently without the irritation and anger. Mischievous smile of a child suggests that the child enjoys the show, you show it - Look, in response to my action as mother of all makes, alters a person's voice! Therefore, we must either do the show did not skip or show is that the child does not like it. The word "impossible" (this is a general recommendation for other cases) can be changed to other expressions such as "what we will not do", "do this stupid", etc.
If a child is bullying (hits) Mom, dad is spared, not the child. A mom takes offense. Shows that, in a tone she does not communicate. The child must understand, my father's behavior is correct, but it is not. At the site you are acting as a teacher. A growling mother of the child, who was hurt. You are at home as a child, which hurt, and as a snarling mother rolled into one. And when the child realizes that he has done something wrong, you again become a teacher. Explain that my mother can not be beat. It must be love and regret.
In general, the situation may be two. First, if there is someone at home more than you and the child sees that you hit a child, this person is fit and starts to feel sorry for her mother, ie, all attention switches to the victim, not the abuser. How to pass a child, pet, sorry mom. Here it is important to no attention given to the child is. No need to say that fighting is bad because it's pointless. Several times, he saw that his punches did not bring attention to him and his mother, the child will begin to wonder.
The second situation, when the house is unoccupied. Then once the child was bitten or hit sharply stand up, remove it from the hands, not scream, do not swear, and silently leave doing things, saying all kind, that you took offense. The main thing do not like the show to the child. Because children and beat his mother to see how she swears, screams, ie want attention and fun show. So "break off" a child in it. He wanted to see my mother cry out, will cry, cry, and you calmly pushed it and went out on business. The child, of course, check again, but your actions have to be exactly the same.
And yet - hit back, too, is impossible. The fact that you have a goal that the child does not bite (not fight). And if you responded to him in his biting, will also bite, then entrenched in his mind that the bite can be time mom does it. He did not connect the pain with the fact that he too was bitten. In other words, if you do not want your child doing something, then it yourself you will never have to demonstrate to the child. Only in this case an undesirable form of behavior will go away.Example 1. The child spits at my grandmother
Actions grandmother: offense and refuses to communicate with the child.
You are quietly watching and then when the child knew what he had done wrong, help him find a solution - explains that her grandmother unpleasant, let's spare her and more so we will not do.
But if my grandmother is not growling, and touched by, if your angry intervention will be an empty hot air. "Grandma something like that. Hence it is really possible. "At this point we have to work with his grandmother.
By the way, the grandmother should not argue with my mother - say, that's how bad you are raising a child. The child perceives it as a game: he spat at my grandmother and started a show called: "Grandma comes over to my mother." And he stands and observes: "That's how I know how to manipulate these older!"
But if my grandmother would be offended and walk away in silence, her mother explains that in our society is so self with grandmothers do not keep the child the next time very much think to do so or not. Children usually try two times, if the reaction is always the same, they stop. If the reaction is different, then try an infinite number of times until you understand what is necessary.Example 2. Father, mother and child are (sitting) on ​​the couch. Child spanking dad
Right action: the child down from the couch to the floor with the explanation that because we do not, father hurt my mother more sorry dad. If, however, does not help the child be expelled from the room, but everything is done quietly, without shouting.
This is your territory. A child on her is on your rules. If you have opened a slap each other, let them continue. If this does not rule your behavior, you show your child that do not behave.Question
Our daughter (1,5 years) to communicate with his sversnikom, a boy of our acquaintance, who fought at every encounter with her. We were not able to stop every time the baby steps. Now the roles have changed. She Lupit it at ev
ery meeting, and not just him. In the courtyard, in the sandbox, she too became a hit children, dragged by the hair. Advise how to stop the habit.Reply
Stop only the relevant joint conduct of women. Temporarily not go back to where it is happening. Try for a time to talk with their mothers, and develop a common strategy of behavior. Main - Mom is obliged to protect your child and napustitsya the offender and the other mom to defend her child. But make sure that everything was done correctly, ostentatiously apologize for my daughter and invite kids to regret the wronged, who cries if a child does not do this - walk ends if doing - continues. Well, mom always on the lookout. Usually, children need is an example of correct behavior. If you demonstrate it, then the child will start this match. Maori MB
First of all, we must understand that negative behavior the child does not come from the fact that he is bad. Child tries to behave differently and reinforces the behaviors that are popular with adults and for not being punished. For example, a child pushed someone, everyone laughs and the child no words can say. He concludes that this kind of behavior is normal, what's the use you give pleasure to others. But if the mother of which had pushed, grabbed to your child, sharply told him that my child can not hurt, and if you try again just would not let him on the mound, that's when the child is already making other findings. And his own mother regrets protects. Mother can not punish your child, she loves it all. Therefore the most reasonable when the other moms on the court "declare war" to you, for it hurts children, and you are saving it from them and say things like "I love you and always will defend, I will not give offense, but you did something do not like other people, if you continue to do so we are on this site will not start. "
Remember that Mom is a defender and savior. Punishing your child, you'll only exacerbate violent behavior. Because the child will conclude that fight and scream well, because my mom sometimes does so.